Suspicious Flashlight Found In Phoenix

People in Phoenix when they woke up were confronted by a terrible sight, a flashlight in the middle of the road. "I was scared when I saw the flashlight just lying there, menacingly." Says Carson Busch, a Phoenix resident. "I swear that it looked a me saying that it would shine it's light on me, and I don't like bright lights, especially from flashlights." Says Cameron Stone, who was visiting Phoenix and was in a hotel across the street from the flashlight. The police arrived after multiple residents reported the flashlight. They found nothing concerning about the flashlight, but when the flashlight magically turned on, they hopped back into their police car and drove to the nearest Dunkin' Donuts.